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These days Leroy felt sick minded and violent he wasnt naturally violent. He could feel himself slipping away from the man he used to be he didnt even know what peace was anymore he didnt know what felt like listening to music and just listening to it was like anymore. It had been so long when Leroy saw little kids all he could think about was yanking out his hair and pulling the bits of skin stuck to his very skull. Then snarl at the kids GO AWAY then he'd walk home with tears in his eyes, throwing his hair backing and wipe the tears away with his trembling fingers. Feeling freakish, just really freaked he impersonated a freak by pretending his enemies were there and pretended to humilate himself in front of them and saying stuff like Iam your sex slave and he wack himself and cut himself saying rude things about himself. Then he'd shake and move his trembling hands as if he was having a seizure. Leslie I miss you he whipered weakly his hands reached out as if to hold onto her hands he pretended she was there and clutched he hands and wrapped his arms around her kissing her baby be mine I WILL I KNOW I WILL SEE YOU IN HEAVEN AGAIN... whatever it takes we will be togheter again I promise... baby I miss you I love you I always will I'll change I promise atleast I hope so I GOTTA CHANGE I GOTTA FOR YOU he said frusteratedly. I love you Leslie

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I look at the mirror and see my face. I ponder the ways of life and death. I go outside and lay in the dust in wonder about my just God. Iam nothing but a human and God you are perfect. Please God I miss my wife Juliet dearly can I see her soon I pray. The light of morning hits my face. and I imagine Juliet is dancing with me. Ive always had faith that you'd come back to me Juliet. You brighten my day Juliet we kissed. We layed in bed as I stroked her hair. She had fair skin and I put on romantic music.

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The decaying sights of animal rot. Leave a stench in my nose I dig a hole to bury the animals. Juliet I think you are my miss swan. I kneel down to the ground and pray to God to see Juliet in Heaven. Without her I seem to wither I pray through gleaming teary eyes.

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The Glory of the Lord is as a victory March. My wife Leslie is as sweet grape juice. God is as a swift sword fighting off evil. Circling army camps of his enemies crushing Satan with his heel. With the choir I sing and play the trumpet marching through the streets to praise him. Let his Holy soul be everlasting.

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Satan he thought you are a crafty little snake trying to crown God with thorns. You would prepare false oaths with your friends and a poison tree to poison them. You'd make a school to teach little kids to be bad. And blot out the light until there is no more peace. Making good people beg from door to door for food. Showering good people with unholy poison water. Being a pestilence to little children. Using your experience in a evil way. Bringing an evil parade in town.

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Heartbreak could kill. Once you loose the one you love it could destroy you and leave you full of pain. Leroy's mind wondered to Leslie his love for her was long lasting. He would never perish for Leslie was his strength. When she died he thought he woiuld loose all his sense. The sun was just about ready to rise. And when it did he would see a bleak sky with sun beams shining down. Leroy walked down to the beach and he imagined Leslie was with him and kissing him, dancing with him. Every eye was on her as there eyes met and they gazed into eachothers. They smiled at eahother his smile made him feel bright as the sun she leaped gracefully in the air and Leroy said youre perfect like a red rose.

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Leroy lay beside a bloody knife it had his blood on it. His hands were cold as blood rushed through his head. Sensibly Leroy read the witches chant from a book. Delighted he kneaded bread dough while chanting about fire. Outside of his house ice began to melt. Winds began to blow. Then he swung the pendulum back and forth. Howling viloent winds pierced the dark night outside. And Leroy found it all quite beautiful. There is no end to the people on earth and suicidal thoughts imprisoned him.

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Leroy sat peacefully on a swing thinking of Calissa. He thought about the troubled world with criminals and poverty. Leroy had attended lectures for gay rights for he always felt he should stand up for what you believe in. They'd argue and the people for gay rights which he was on usually won. Each day since Calissa was gone his fragile heart pushed on through the days. He looked at his reflection. He felt like a crazy mess after Leslie died. I was sick of the assasains attacking me.

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Leroy lay on the grass beside the insane asylum. Breathing in dust he coughed. He got up and put water on his face from a puddle. He began to explore the insane asylum with a flashlight he looked at the wooden forlorn walls with pictures. He went back outside and played a game of hopscotch. Then he drew pictures of him and his long lost love Leslie. He carved a picture of him and Leslie on a tree.
The next day Leroy woke up with a stiff neck and just felt empty. He eyed himself in the mirror he was a young twenty year old. He went outside to walk around soul searching. He felt distant from the world around him. He missed his long lost love Leslie.

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Leroy sowed a patch in his jeans up. Then he went to the laundry mat it was winter and stormy outside. When I got there I saw a child's teddybear on the floor anhd handed it to her and told her about my teddybear. I told the child that when I was a kid I was always eager to buy a teddybear. I began to also talk about ways to get to sleep faster like counting sheep. I told the child how watching the back of my wifes hair was like basking in the sun. I told the child I would never take Leslie for granted. When I got home I donated to charity for my giving mood.

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Leroy punched his pillow he was trapped by the assasains and he had to win a chess game with a chessmaster to talk to Leslie. He had been kept here as a slave. He begged to see his wife. The Chessmaster shrugged at Leroy then hit him. I closed my eyes as I cried I imagined wearing my tuxcedo and kissing Leslie giving her butterflies as we kissed. I continued playing chess until I won then I talked to Leslie breathlessly. I told her the assasains wanted to kill God and me. I told her I had to beat them at there mind games to save God. I told her to cross her fingers for me. I said goodbye for I saw a knife in the chessmasters hand. He had a wild look in his eyes of danger. I began to cry as he put a knife to my throat. I love you Leslie I thought.

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A baby's head lay in Leroy's arms in the dark night its mother cried for her baby Leroy began to run. He ran into an alley and fed the baby a bottle of milk. Behind him in the alleyway a assain punched him. No he thought Ive got to protect the baby and then he passed out. The baby was born as a witch unto God for magic protection. He began to think what it would be like to have a baby with Juliet he thought he couldnt handle it. Babies were too whiny for him. Meanwhile the assainsins were doing a ritual with the baby to turn the baby witch evil. Leroy woke up and ran towards the assains hideout and poured gasoline on the floor and lit a fire. The place blazed with fire and Leroy rescued the baby unharmed. He ran home set the baby witch in a crib and prepared a ritual in the bathroom for the baby. He kissed the baby's forehead and chanted the words then lit the candles, muttered a chant while bathing the baby.

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I was with Calissa and gave her a heart shaped pendent. I stroked her hair and told her I loved her then kissed her. I told her I felt like a a little boy again when I was with her she had the power to give me butterflies every day. My lips were tense and we kissed again. My valentine I said as my hands clinged onto her hands lets us have a candlelight dinner with wine tonight. We had toast with honey and wine. I spoke spanish to her and we talked about our love for eachother. At the end of dinner I gave her a red rose.

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A fly was buzzing around my head I opened my eyes to see the light of morning lighting my face. I put on my tuxcedo and grabbed a red rose and headed off. I imaginged Calissa running in front of me as I chased after her. She began to skip and sing Leroy my early summer come catch me. I wanted to gaze into her pretty blue eyes there were as the blue sky making the world seem at peace. A breeze hit my face and I breathed in the wind, as I breathed in the wind I smelt her cinnamon perfume. Then she dissapered I rested on a mountain under a tree with a bee's hive and pictured Calissa laying beside me my long lost love.

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I lay in the grass with Juliet. I said I want to lay like this forever and watch the clouds. I made a suggestion for a candlelight dinner with her with her friends over. She got dressed and her beauty stunned me. Her friends came over and teased me that they were going to have a catfight over me. And reapetedly said I want to be a princess me, me, no, me. I turned around and my lips met Juliet's we kissed and then had dinner. Ladies my, you look beautiful tonight especially you Juliet I said smiling sweetly and gazing into her eyes. After dinner I put a necklace around Juliet's neck and kissed her. Then I flirted with her by compilmenting how crazy in love she made me feel. She gave me butterflies everytime I thought about her. I kissed her again and felt like I was in the clouds and never wanted to come down.

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The air surrounds me, a bell rings in my ghostly town. I watch a dove and think of how I wish women could get whatever they wanted like princess and how I wish I could show them things they'd never believe in a virtural reality world. Tears run down my face and I scratch my itchy nose. I wish write a very detailed story about God and solve mysteries about him. I walk home and go into my bath but first I pour red dye into the bath tub so it'd look like I was bleeding in the bath tub. After my bath I go to the insane asylum with the termites and climb the stairs my foot slips and dust falls on me. I continue to climb the stairs and halloucinate a dove at the top of the staircase and Iam in the middle of the stormy ocean. I gasped as I come to surface for air but the waves keep crashing down on me and Iam swimming after my wife Juliet. She is in a boat the world seems to dissapear as the water goes up over my head. A leaf hits my face it's very detailed like the beauty of God's soul.

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When Leslie left his world his world got colder. He cried alot and cried more until the silence of night came in his sleep. He dreamed he was with his long lost love Leslie again and his cold lips touched hers and there cheeks were pale too and suddendly turned pink as soon as they kissed. Rain began too fall and it dripped down there face I love you he said breathlessly whispering in her ear. She knew him so well and he looked into her eyes and fell deeply in love with her. Were back together I love you my long lost love Leslie.

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Calissa he said he was alone in his bedroom you are my princess, my miss swan. He began daydream of dancing with his true love Calissa as a kind hearted gentleman reaching out his hand and leading her into a romantic dance. Iam yours to keep he whispered into her ear and can't rest content if Iam not yours to keep. He burn with excitement as they kissed. Fairytales passed through his eyes of romance. He continued passionately kissing Calissa and woke up out of his daydream and craved Calissa by his side. My long lost love Calissa he said. He got out of bed and made a fire outside.

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Leroy sighed, longing for Leslie morning to night is something he'd get used to. He began to walk along the beach Leslie Leslie... my long lost love he said. He sang a song called Come back to me now my love in a enchanting ghostly voice. He looked at the red rose in his hand and said she is perfect then set the rose on the water and watched it float away I'll see you again as this rose will meet shore again if I have to live lonely all my days untill death for my long lost love Leslie. When you come back there will be celebration for I will have had the chance to hold her again my long lost love Leslie. He twirled around happily my tiny dancer we'll be dancing in a fairytale castle. Your beauty has captured me your blue eyes and curly blond hair. Leroy's home was in Leslie's heart. Leroy smiled I'll be happy as the sun lighting the sky when Iam with her. He wanted to look lovingly into her eyes and cry tears of joy for my long lost love Leslie.

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Leroy said Iam everybody's fool a clown. But where is my mind rushing thin through my blood stream. I sing as a dog waiting for death for his long lost love. A dog leaping through the dusty dirtroads prowling for rats who have tried to outsmart him. Will you ever be mine again Juliet how I miss your hands holding mine. As I slam against a wall again and again for you, running my to get to you but I keep crashing against that wall. To me you will always be magic for you make my dreams appear like fairydust and our life is like a fairytale. Her voice was that of a bleeding rose, the voice of a human heart and she was very caring. I'd give her the world anytime. I love you my long lost love Calissa.

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The grass outside was gold and the weather was hot. Nature had a stoitic beauty about it like the rivers and steams went on and on and crashed against the rocks. Leroy picked up a red rose and said Juliet Id hold you up high above the world anytime. Leroy sat down near a river and wondered about the majestic beauty of God he was as a sparkling clear river flowing through his fingers. Leroy wanted to gaze into Juliet's eyes and lay his head on her and wipe away tears of joy they had shared together. When she had died it destroyed him he desperately wanted to hold her hand again. Leroy looked at the sun and pictured him and Juliet in heaven. Leroy missed the smell of her cinamon perfume, her sitting on his lap and holding hands, buying boxes of chocolate for her and he'd just miss being sweet to her.

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Leroy was drawing pictures of Juliet from the shakepere book of Romeo and Juliet. He wanted to be her Mr Right and bulid her dreams with his two hands. He wrote poetry that rhymed with her name Juliet. Juliet even if romance ran out of rhyme I would give you my heart until the end of time my valentine. Leroy wanted to speak words of love to her while his hands caressed her face. He'd love her endlessly he'd spend eternity up in space watching the stars above with her. Leroy sang there wedding song and kept the beat perfectly. Nothing could come between the two of them he loved her. He used to get jealous when she looked at other men but they would stay together untill the end with his long lost love Juliet.

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I want to dream big Juliet he sighed. He pulled down the curtains on the train's window. He was on a train to Boston. Carrying a trenchcoat to return and his diary and sentimental letters about Juliet. Leroy began to read about Juliet and he couldn't feel a thing from his head down to his toes. His home was in Juliet's hearts and she loved him unconditionally. Every now and then he'd fall in love with Juliet all over again and feel like he was in the clouds. Juliet was the fire inside his heart that made him fly to the moon. He wanted to die on the same day Juliet had for it was when he died on earth and lived as a ghost. He wanted to pronounce his love for her to the world with fireworks. She understood him like nobody else. I miss you my long lost love Juliet he said.

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Leroy needed company he remembered Calissa and him at a barn dance her hair was curly and blond. Leroy talked like a gentleman and blushed pink through his cheeks as he asked her to dance. When she said yes and there hands touched Leroy felt enchanted by the warmth of her hand. He left to get a drink at the snack stand. A hand touched his back he stood still for he wanted to see her face in excitement. It was instead General John Mackenzie they began to talk about war. He saw Calissa walk out of the barn and followed her. She turned around and saw him. They kissed she said were more then just best friends were husband and wife. They kissed passionately and she rubbed his back. He gazed into her eyes longingly and was consumed in his love for her. He gently kissed her and said I love you as there hands intertwined. They jumped around in a hay stack. She had the power to put his heart in flames. They went home and had an all nighter of passionate talks.

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Leroy looked at the stars in the sky and wanted a constellation of him and Leslie to be up there in space. He climbed into his car and felt passionate love go through his veins for Leslie as the wind pushed against his hair. Leroy remembered laying in the grass with Leslie's head on his chest watching the stars just loosing himself in her love as she lay there and he could listen to her voice all night. Leroy drove to the park and picked a red rose and smelled it, all the things we used to do he thought, we went everywhere toghether. He had thought about her everyday since he had first laid eyes on her and still did. He was dressed in his best tuxcedo tonight for he had always promised to be her Mr. Right and the best she ever had.

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Leroy was playing on repeat his last saved messages he had 25 debts to pay to the assasains they were mocking who he was as a person and talking down to him mentally and threatening him. His life was out of control and was praying to God to show his loving face to him. He was moving away from the phone and tenseley hid behind chairs. The hairs on his arms stood up on end he looked as Leslie's picture and swore her eyes were real and staring at him. Leroy rocked on the floor. Im sorry he apologized to himself and moved away from himself. Hard times wait for me tomorrow. He turned the radio station on and listened to rock and roll. He thought about his wife Leslie he lost himself in her eyes and fell in love all over again. He hid the things he knew down in his soul he saw other women and wanted them but also knew he'd have to take it real slow for that realationship. How could my long lost love Leslie leave me he said breathlessly.

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She's an angel he said smiling in his sleep. He would never lie to her. All he wanted was for Calissa to come back. He was tied to his dreams of her and hoped she'd come back and she'd be alive and wake him up with a kiss. Her kiss made him feel like he was in heaven and her death was like a car crash. He wanted to be a cowboy in the desert searching for his long lost love Calissa. When the assasains came with there crimanl insanity in there brains he prayed to God each and everyday for her not to die. Leroy was dreaming he was in the desert white people were dancing around him they were cowboys drinking and hugging. Leroy got up as if struck by lightning he took a bottle of whiskey and hopped on one of the horses and galopped away. Muttering there after me again. They weren't even following him they were so drunk. He got to a cave and hid and drank muttering this drink will be my death and when Iam dead and gone my heartache for my long lost love Calissa will be over.

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Leroy wanted to be in the air spinning in a tornado. He wanted to see God's hand and hold it hard and be wherever God's mind was above the world. Take me there God where the ghost Iam can wear shackels on my feet. He would have given up all of himself, all his strength, soul and mind to God. He was completely consumed in his passionate caring for God and it left him floating weak in the sky breathless unable to take his eyes off of God. He dreamed he was flying in the air after God he was so tempted to run his hands up and down God's body and surrender to loving him. Leroy held a thorn in his hand and his hand was bleeding he showed it to God and said I'd bleed for you anytime. Smoke seeped from the earth there was a fire in one of the houses on earth God said I must help them and left. Leroy said wherever you go I'll be waiting at the other end of the phone waiting for your call for you to come back. Leroy missed his long lost love Juliet.

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I don't want to be touched anymore by another woman or loved he was cold inside. He wondered what would become God's mind. Leroy's world after Leslie had died had been cold and cruel. And he'd do anything to be with her again. He'd go wherever she would go for the love in the air for her was still strong. Leroy remembered shaking and bleeding for he knew he couldnt tell the assainsains about God. Leslie's face haunted him in his sleep he remembered all the places they went to and it ringed a alarm in his head he wanted her back in his life. He sang a song to his long lost love Leslie. Leroy drank some beer and tears flowed down his face nothing could complete him except her. He remembered her walking down the aisle with her wedding dress on. He swore to her he'd be her Mr Right while saying there wedding vows to eachother. Leroy knew she'd stand in his heart forever like nobody else and never wanted her to go away. The world seemed black and white without her and he was falling apart without her in his life. She had given him life. The house without her around just wasnt the same without his long lost love Leslie.

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Leroy wanted to have an instruction manual on how to fill God's needs when he was feeling stresssed because he was mentally ill. Leroy walked down the street into an intersection. He thought his life was like an intersection because it was where all roads met. Everything in his life led to Calissa and God the people he wanted nothing more than the best for them. They were waiting for him in heaven. Leroy's hopes sank to the bottom of the ocean when he thought about God's needs not being met. He felt like swimming down into the ocean trying to carry God up to the surface. The people on the street looked like they were moving in slow motion. He went into the mall they were having a party there. He danced low to the floor like a zombie and acting out his own death. A group of people were dressed up as Egyptians doing the egyptian walk. A fake cloud of grey smoke went around them. Everyone fell to the ground and acted out there disbelief. After the party was over Leroy sat against a bench and prayed that God would never be mistreated. And missed his long lost love Calissa.

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Leroy was sipping on powerade Leroy was about to be tested by God. An angel called his name into the office he had to do and essay. How old have problems been around in the world he wrote since Adam and Eve for trillion of years since Adam and Eve. Women have been told to act perfectly before and I sincerley believe God has a severe mental illness because of it. They've been treated like property and not human beings. All women should be treated like princesess and treated humaneley. Men who abuse women's rights should be drowned like a fish out of water. The best things in life are free so why would somebody want something free. Yes why because they want to have a good life. But what if it means hurting the innocent then that's when the authourities have to come in. Scars can be left on one's life for as long as one can remember so authourity is important. Leroy wrote I'd become God's soldier anyday. God's mental illness means the world to me. Leroy was determined to be Mr Brightside and Mr Right and solve all of God's problems. Leroy wanted to lock up all the men who abused women and God. Leroy was done the test and had a feverish feeling through his blood handed it in and ran home crying.

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Leroy was dellousinal. Leroy was thinking about men who had abused him mentally. Leroy felt incapable of loving another woman again. Leroy's tounge was wagging out of his mouth as he drank beer drowning in his sorrow. Leroy had turned his back against himself and remember the last time he was outside his own house he was muttering down the street and people wondered if he was okay. Leroy was scared of loving another woman his blood feverishly ran under his skin when he saw another woman. The light of morning had just come out. Leroy was dehyrated and hadn't slept all night all he did was think and not relax so he got a cup of water. On his way to get a drink he walked around dizzily. And cried God your mental illness has left me sleepless. Leroy held Juliet's picture in his hand and said I miss you my long lost love.

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Leroy wanted to fly into the beautiful warm air that surrounded him outside. It was a dead night outside. He read to Calissa Iam woody woodpecker arrgh dangnabbit my wings are broken by slyvester the cat. Calissa read now the dog is trying to fly. They were reading a comic book on the beach. Leroy said as he licked his ice cream cone your love is better than ice cream and anything else that ive tried. Calissa playfully slapped his hand you should know better to even have the thought of comparing me to an ice cream cone for Iam definitley much better than that. Okay princess let's run to the water and see how deep we can get in. So they did and when they got as deep as they could get they kissed and felt like they'd never come down from the clouds.

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The Leroy remembered being mentally abused he was in a hotel room. What was left of him had been left behind. Leroy was on his knees I never want to dissapoint my God he said freakishly curling his hands, clawing at himself, pacing and twitching,... .... .... God he whispered to the ground have men abused you mentally so much that your not independent anymore. Leroy looked at the barbie caslte he brought with him Juliet you are my princess. He then bent over and ripped the wallpaper in the barbie castle and rocked back and forth on the floor I don't like colored wallpaper. He saw Ken and dressed him up as a policeman take God in no questions asked and me and my family. Leroy halloucinated God was beside him and just touched his hand and and walked into the hallway, I miss the little things about you Juliet I miss everything about you Juliet. He followed God out into the hallway he saw the men who abused him mentally hold God as though he was a prisoner and said Leroy you've crossed the last line.

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Leroy put a wire around his leg with a key on it. He was pretending he was in jail because Leslie had stolen his life away after she died. Last night Leroy woke up screaming. He was curled up in a ball feeding off his fear about the assassins. He was really worried about God because he knew he got tripped, when God had tried to deliver a message to him about the assassins. Leroy later found out that God had been tripped when he tried to deliver the message to him to save the world from evil. Leroy had a tantrum, he was balling his eyes out, there was no smile on his face, he felt there would be no smile on his face ever again he was wearing thin down to the core so much. Hateful energy built up against the assaisns. Leroy wrote suicide poems while cutting his arms. But his faith had never died for God. God was a beautiful messed up mystery to him. Leroy looked out of at there floor and saw his shadow and muttered the assasins are using voodoo dolls he said freakishly. Leroy walked around the halls of his house as if searching for ghosts. Leroy put on sandals and walked around in the snow as if drunk. Then he changed changed into his real winter clothes and walked to the church. He was at the church and prayed Iam working on solving a mysteries about you and holding on to the hope of solving them all someday.

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Leroy kissed God's forehead and spilt his heart out to him saying Iam a train wreck waiting to happen waiting for a strong independent woman to pick me off of the tracks. Iam a wildfire born out of frustration. When Juliet was here her love lifted me up where I was sane. I want to put a fire in my hair then jump around crying. I can't believe myself when I look back on happier days and now her eyes at night were as midnight fireflies and being without her... Leroy couldnt breathe. Leroy regained his breath I feel like Iam in war and your firefly eyes are the only thing there lighting my path. Leroy sobbed I just want to fall deep into your arms and loose myself in your kiss my long lost love Juliet.

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Leroy was at God's bedside showing him a picture book of smiley faces. He began to talk about his familiy and how they used to read this book to him and it made him feel loved. Innocence was in his voice and God looked up at him approvingly. Winter's end speaks like the love for your wife Calissa God spoke softly. Leroy's lips trembled and said there's nothing I'd like better than to fall out of the sky and just keep falling. The never ending want for her kiss again has led me into a storm with no shelter. This place is so empty I have nothing to lose I just want to be tangled up in her embrace. My long lost love Calissa's embrace he said and prayed for God's well being.

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Leroy was walking on a balance beam in the middle of a store. Perfect life, for him? nope just the perfect lie without Juliet. On the balance beam Leroy walked around making no sense as to why he was doing it in a storm. Which was also like his realationship with his long lost love Juliet wherever he turned all he saw these days was her, and he felt frightened and confused. His sadness had made him a mad man he was so sad it brought him to his knees. He felt someone pull him up off his knees it was Juliet. He woke up out of his silent reverie. Iam in the arms of an angel I can finally rest my head on my long lost love Juliet he said.

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Leroy was dreaming he was a ghost and Calissa was in a puddle of water with red rose petals in a white wedding dress. Iam not good enough he sobbed and cried. He spent his whole life waiting to be with Calissa. Leroy whacked himself hard in the face with a stick and freakishly talked down to himself like the men who had talked down to him, abusing himself mentally. Leroy walked over to Calissa, knelt down in the puddle and held up her head crying. I just want the best for God... Leroy sobbed bawling his eyes out. He saw a rat on the ground nearby and killed it with his foot. You dirty rotten enemies of God you rats and he stomped on the rat and shreiked. Please be okay God he muttered kissing Calissa's forehead I'll make it better then it ever was. Please he begged like a sick man to Calissa while thinking of God, worried sick entranced by God's inner beauty. Don't go, don't stop searching we could sing songs about little princesses and you be the number one princess. Remember that song Butterfly, Early Summer. I...I brought the papers with me with the lyrics on them he shone them in the sun and sang butterfly. Butterfly flew away where she is loved into blue sunnier days, Gold crisps mornings light her way, she'll fly, fly away, into her princes arms. He sobbed his hands twitched touching his tearstrained face. And sang Early Summer. It was about waiting so long just to be the next to be with someone. Leroy unsteadily moved his hands up Calissa's body and kissed her passsionately you are the best I ever had. I know if God had a face it be miss swan given after long lost loves.

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Leroy said Id do anything, anything he sweared he'd twist a very smouldering hot knife that just got out of the welders into his bleeding heart which pounded for God. Leroy dropped to the ground and kissed it saying it was the only solid thing in his life. God was his inspiration that light at the end of the tunnel. He ran to it he said freakishly I'll beat the begeezus out of myself if I ever let you down God. Frustrated he began to climb the rocks I won't break under the pressure of not sweeping God off of his feet he said freakishly. He rubbed his face sweating I love my God grabbing onto the rocks for dear life you twinkle like a sparkling diamond. He reached the top and sweeped God off of his feet and led him up the stairwell. While he was leading him up the stairwell he the wind cast the smell of freshly cut green grass. When he got to the top he put God into a hot tub and then into a bed and put on light music and prayed I'll be at your bedside alltimes and kissed his hand.

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Leroy peeked his head out under the hospital blankets. The assasains were talking. There words weighed him down. The darkness in his room make him choke nervously he silently prayed. God please have mercy on my soul and deliver me into heaven. I want to burn down there hideout of the assasains the people who tried to kill you. Misery is beautiful isnt it like the detail in the leaves. Ive been searching for a reason to live and for the past years I havent figured that out. Ive been searching for a light at the end of the tunnel. When I reach the light Iam going to find people who love me and you and will see you lifted on a high throne being bowed too. Juliet he said to his long lost love you've always had that rich gooey center about you and a sparkle about you. Leroy couldn't get to sleep so he crawled under the beds so the assasisains wouldn't see him. He poked the window under the nurses station. Yes they answered what can I do for you. Leroy said may I please have a glass of water and I want someone to talk to. They got him some water and he told them what was going on. Leroy took some medication to get to sleep. He found out he was halloucinating the part about the assasains.

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If you leave me tonight said Leroy I wont love you any less. I might be too irritable to talk being as Iam in a hospital. He blew his nose on a kleenex, aww the state Iam in. Your jaded said Calissa but I'll leave after I say a few things all your life you wanted to hold your precious tiny dancer in your hand Iam your dream come true. Generations of children have been brought up since Adam and Eve. And your prayers for God's mental state have never dimmed. Your love for him could light up the sky. And my dreams were never empty he cried eyes bawling with tears heart pounding with a broken heart full of love and worry for God. The assaisains she continued you think of them as vultures preying on his mind mentally that all you ever did was want to hold him through the darkest of his days and feel his warm breath on your face. Leroy pressed his tear stricken face against the window sobbed and closed his ears. God deserves nothing but sympathy after all he's been through he said. Sadness, gloom and death have consumed his life said Leroy. She continued on Leroy your depressed the things that used to make you happy in life are gone. Your still here my long lost love Calissa. His halloucination of her dissapeared.

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He blew kisses to Calissa and shouted your a girl I just got to have. He ran to her and swept her into his arms and led her up the hotel stairs. Room service my sweetheart he said putting a rose petal in her hair kissing her lips gently. Every night Ive been with you feels like the best nights of my life. There hands linked, she tried to talk but he put his finger on her lips. Don't talk just let me lead you into a slow dance where we get lost in eachothers eyes. Your so affectionate and everything Ive ever wanted in a woman, you know your face has been on my lovestruck mind. How about we play bingo about our realtionship to quiz our romantic minds. There was a knock on there hotel door Leroy said let me get that, nodding politely. Always the gentleman Calissa said. Leroy opened the door and got the room service. They dimmed the lights and talked about having a all nighter of there feelings for eachother, just there feelings and passion. Her cinnamon perfume had turned him into a daze and he couldn't take his eyes off of her from the moment he had first laid eyes on her. So what do women want he asked cheerfully. She answered to party in our pajamas watching The Simpsons for a sleepover.

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Hours passed as Leroy lay on the floor of the old abandoned building with termites. Juliet I feel so cold he thought and he couldnt talk all he could do is breathe. The night was dark outside and his hands were as ice. The very floor he lay on felt like thin ice with a cold rapid underneath it. And when he fell through the ice water he would soon forget the feeling of being cold and just feel death. His halloucination of Juliet spoke Iam worried about you Leroy. Leroy subtley moved his lips but couldnt because the pain he felt tied him down. The only comfort was Juliet's voice which reminded him of a calming river flowing gently in his hands. But her voice also reminded him of the river in a bad way like in drowning in the dark. The robotic brain glands they put in my head for world domination have left me with no strength in my once hopeful strong soul. He sighed and prayed to God the warmth in my hands now must be deceptive to how I really Iam for I feel so cold when it comes to my long lost love Juliet.

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You are the picture I see everytime I close my eyes he cried moving his hands up and down her picture unsteadily OH CALISSA. He was dreaming of being in a room of lace curtains chasing after his long lost love Calissa. There were children playing skip to romantic skipping rhymes Calissa and him used to play also. There was a genie lamp were Calissa would be his princess and he would give her, her three wishes. Her cinnamon perfume filled the air now they were in a patch of grass playing pinned you. They looked longinly into eachothers warm loving eyes that they both felt at home in eachothers eyes. They'd do funky dances together and afterwards would just kiss passionately and move there hands up and down eachothers body holding on tightly never wanting to come down from that kiss that felt like there first. Leroy held a red rose petal in his hand and blew it too her we'll always be toghether Calissa your perfect like this rose and your personality sparkels like a diamond. Let the touch of my hand let you know Iam going to catch you whenever you fall my long lost love Calissa.

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Juliet you are all the things I desire you complete me. The one true thing I believe in. My fears troubles melt away like the ice cubes in the basking glow of the radiant sun. You are that rock I can lay my head against while the world is lost at sea. Whenever I wanted to fight with you all you did was hold me. Whenever I pushed to see how far you'd go you never left my side. You never stoop to the lows of abusive men but are the light of my room. You've seen me talk about abusive men to women, its my weakest link I tear up papers with hateful words about them with my teardrops on them. And you just... just take me as Iam. Iam such a drifter these days without you because all I do is wander around thinking about the safety of your arms. I feel like drowning because my world just flips and falls, up and down without you. Sorry Iam just feeling so crazy these days without you my long lost love Juliet. Your love picks me up when Iam feeling this way and its all I need to get me through the day wrote Leroy in his diary.

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Leroy woke up he was against a shopping store wall outside. Geisha surrounded him whispering we'll fill up the emptyness. Close your eyes you are drifting in the universe of imagination whispered the Geishas you don't want to come down, your with people who love you the most, theres ball dancing at the party your in the host announces Leroy has arrived. The crowd chants come on home with us. A beautiful lady makes her way through the crowd to see him, it was Leslie she stroked his face and the coldness he felt melted away come home. The crowd stops to stare mesmerized Leroy responds wherever you will go my long lost love Leslie. Leroy leaves the Geishas and said he needed to go home and left.

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Leroy had never imaginged being with a faithful, strong and could do no wrong in his eyes kind of woman then he met Leslie and he got the breath knocked out of him by her beauty. You will always have my love and affection Leslie no matter what. See that unfinshed patch in those pair of jeans that need to be knitted everything comes around in time she reasured him soothingly. Leslie let's knit it toghether their hands reached for the sowing needle then there hands touched they looked away from eachother quickly as they blushed then kissed passionately. Your expectations bury me and are too high for me to do this. Well give yourself room for mistakes said Leslie. You know what said Leroy whenever I was with my parents and I was younger whenever I couldn't get what I wanted I sucked up to the other one. ...Whenever I couldn't get what I wanted... his halloucination of Leslie was gone this time I'll never get what I want you Leslie my long lost love.

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Just take one day at a time Leroy said. Tomorrow could make me smile and sing. Am I in heaven with Leslie no not there yet he growled. The woman I loved left my life God he prayed at the church please let her enter the doors of heaven. I sometimes lie awake thinking about heaven and hell and the crossroads we take to get there. A peacefull night, I wish to sleep. But can't because Leslie wasn't just my wife she was my best friend. Life has burdened me so much with the loss of her I refuse to believe she is gone and eachday she is gone hurts like hell for me. I hold onto my long lost love Leslie's picture while I sleep dreaming of her face.

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There's no one left to blame Leroy said quivering in the winter air scratching his face like he was on crystal meth. There's no one to talk to he said his tears freezing on his face and lips moving numbly. I feel so empty he said dizzy and fell sideways, tipsy nothing that a drink can't fix. Leroy searched himself where did it all go wrong, his heart answered you couldn't carry on after Leslie died and your once strong heart deteriorated into heartbreak. All the beauty his wife possessed made him feel dizzy he muttered I'll save her from the tower she's locked up in my princess. The assasains were pointing fingers at him, men were talking down to him. He ran inside his house and barred the doors you can't change the way I feel he said severely. Then miserably Leroy began kissing the floor hopefully you won't betray me he said to the floor. Were all innocent said his hallouciation of Leslie to him. Leroy faltered to speak and fainted.

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Destiny is calling me I can't escape my fate said Leroy luckily if its meant to be it will just happen. My heartbreak for my long lost love Leslie will come when I see her in heaven and I will feel a quiet inner peace and my heart will mend. Love still hurts these days my new vision of love after she died has been like it was in the eyes of a ghost wondering around thinking of her.
When she died it was like a plane crash, except in slow motion. Who can save my cold soul, why you my red rose, Leslie. The sun could melt me Iam so cold I cant take my eyes off of you he said grabbing his face. In the story of Leroy's life Leroy had little light shed on his worn heart. Leroy dreamed he was chasing after the girl Leslie but the run seemed as 3 days to see her in heaven for the love he held in his heart for Leslie.

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Heaven bends over backwards to realate to me General John Mackenzie. What do you me said the General. Leroy said I always intend to do the right thing but whenever I go to a womens house for abused women. I go to the gym the very next day and beat up my boxing opponent and come home crying because the faces of men who abuse women haunt me. Nobody understands me except my still fresh love even though she's dead, Leslie. Why do you go to womens houses the General asked quietly. I have a innate sence of justice for women especially because men have abused me badly too. Awkward silence... Leroy the General said I wish your abusers would apoligize to you. Leroy snapped lifes been a burden for me because of those men. This burden of abuse is more then I can bring to my own table, like pulling the sunken Titanic out of water with a rope, more then I can handle. But your able of mending wounds and putting the past in the past said the General. Look up there said Leroy like a druggie and whispered the sky is falling and remembered all the bad things men had said to him, he scolded himself and started wacking himself with a stick and cried.

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The pathway of life, Leroy thought Ive tried my best. One miss step and the assainsains try to get you down. He remembered a time with Calissa they were climbling up a steep slope on a river bend and were holding on to branches for dear life he thought time to fall Iam already about to miss a step. Calissa then spoke up this climb is like a realationship unattended but not ours our love will take us up this hill she said brightly. Leroy thought more about the pathway of life and wanted to redeem abused people with this climb. Abusers could never have sunk so lower these days. Leroy being the teddybear he was would cry at the thought of unkindness in the world. Well dont say I told you so abusers he thought lips curling into a sneer. Leroy wanted to looked back on his life as a real man, a fireman who went into burning buildings to save a baby even if his clothes got burnt. A soldier who fought from midnight to crisp morning hours with wounds that may never heal but was proud of them for he fought for a good cause. You walk around with invisible scars that no one can see while feeling a sence of loss like your trying to find the voice you lost a long time ago. The one that wants to speak up for the things you held so dear.

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Leroy and Calissa would copy flower petals into a book called A hundred flower petals to comprehend how beautiful Calissa is. He'd do the same with leaves for he loved the detail in them. On there anniversary Calissa would be alone on Red Rose Island and Leroy alone on the closest piece of land nearby. With them they had two pieces of red rope and red rose flower petals, they'd tie the pieces of red rope and chant by the bonds of fate let us be reunited with our soulmates and send the rose petals into the wind for there soulmate to find at there doorstep, carried by the wind, sent by there true love. And when they found eachother they'd know that's the one and in eachothers eyes they'd have that special sparkle about them and into them. Then they kissed like it was there first again so full of passion. Leroy bounced a yo-yo and said I'll always come back to you like this yo-yo.

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Leroy choked apparentley General John Mackenzie was pretty good at swearing. General John Mackenzie said the other rotten army has plotted a ambush around our tents. When I write to Leslie, the love of my life and my dream come true she'll be worried sick atleast I can turn it into a different story and make it about her. Lately all my stories are about her, all I think of is her I stare at the river nearby so my creativity will flow nicely to woo her with a romantic story. The General exclaimed you alright there Leroy. Leroy was pale, cold and sweaty he was zoned out to a different time the assasains had framed him and he was running around like a fugitive. He was hiding at a circus in Boston and was disguised as one of the clowns. The police were hot on his tail. After the show was over he went down one of the trapped doors and wrote in his diary ''there trying to get me I can feel it''. They want to hurt me but I...I can't let that happen he muttered lips moving numbly. He wrote Leslie my long lost love your love can pull me through anything and kissed her photo. He police arrived and yelled hands in the air your under arrest you have the right to remain silent. When he got to the police station he told them everything and the police said we'll try to talk to the assasains and bring them into the authourties.

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Can you imagine screaming at the feeling of peace in your body. Leroy could he was apprehensive and paranoid when he felt he let his guard down about the assasains trying to hurt God and his family. Leroy screamed banging his head on his bedroom wall he jitterly cut his hands with a razor. His head was bleeding he hobbled tensely to get kleenex and tape for his wounds. He drank beer alot that day, while he was drunk he knelt to the ground and begged like a dog to its vomit saying my precious God watch me fade away to grey, my favourite color, the color of my trenchcoat. He sing along stupidly to a song he made Oy Beer aint for goats and cowards its for sailors. Yes, yes he stood up crazy eyed and pale he vomited,... the assasains are coming there coming hide. He hid in his closet and wrote dreary poems written in his blood. He then passed out in the closet. He dreamed of perfection in God and how he knew everything or did he and if things were going bad would karma get to him badly in the end and be the fall of him. Leroy also thought about Juliet in his dream they were in lazyboy chairs having a massage watching The Simpsons. You will always be my comforter Juliet and my long lost love.

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Ring... the phone was ringing Leroy was about to talk to the mental distress line. Hello he said weakly Iam worried sick about God like as in physically ill. Iam a paranoid szaphrenic and am paranoid that God abused women because he was not in the right state of mind and did it to abuse himself in a very bad mental way. I would like to tell you some of the problems I think God might be having... They talked Leroy said he wanted the world to get involved meaning 6 billion helping him out. After they were done talking Leroy biked down the street crying he felt like a sensitive sing song bird who was wounded and had its wings broken and just wanted to cry teardrops of blood. I want to hold on too you for dear life my snuggle puppy he could hear his wife whisper sensitively. Then he bowed to her his head was on her belly and said Iam your comforter not a superstar, your snuggle puppy as long as I live with you in my heart which probably means forever knowing me he cried shaking with tears. Through chopped up words because he was crying he said remember that ladybug we found one day on the beach we linked hands as it crawled through both of our hands saying if we ever parted I'd just think I got to breath you can't take that away from me. When you died I thought that lovebug we had would go away. But I was wrong our love was stronger and will stand beside the only thing left of you, your picture forever. He cried and talked more Iam afraid God finds it difficult to move because he's been mentally abused so much and finds it hard to make the right decision because he thinks it could be wrong to move to help others and then leaves himself to stay behind and get hurt massacistacally. I feel hollow right now, so very hollow I need to take a week off just to sleep. Leroy fell against the back of a wall of a store and fell asleep. He dreamed of a perfect phone system where any abused person could go. And people would give so much advice and God would here it and get better and do the right things. He was sweaty and cold and worried.

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Calissa I miss the swing of your hips. Your cinnamon perfume, picking up seashells by the beach so I could make you feel even more beautiful by making necklaces with them and decorating your hair. The things we did for fun made us so happy. We engraved our names into the maple tree in our yard Leroy and Calissa forever. We'd dare eachother to eat jalapeno peppers and other really hot foods as symbolism as in we our the best at having the spiciest realtionship against other couples, we are a hot pair he said kissing her picture. They wanted their realationship to be so hot she'd dress in abercombie and finch like the devil's adovocate and he'd dress up like the devil with a ripped shirt showing his abs. They'd pretend to be Mr and Mrs Smith at a shopping mall in broad daylight stealing with there cunning charms. They didn't actually do that of course but he dreamed of wooing her at the mall by dressing up as Zoro and they'd pretend they never met and he was the one and only womanizer. They'd play cards and everytime she won he'd give her heart shaped sweet tarts but only the sweet ones because girls are sugar and spice and everything nice. The Queen of Hearts beat me again he declared. They had spaghetti and would eat the same spaghetti noodle until they kissed.

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The assasains the assasains!!! Leroy exclaimed he was locked up in a room and had cut the rope he had been tied to. He stood on a chair to get to a window with his mirror and the sun the sent morse code through to his other gangster friends in there hangout outside. The code said sneaky much sneakiness kinds of torture there using on me and mentally bringing me down. SOS HELP!!!. Clever many games of the mind to challenge your wit he muttered then sang cause every girl's crazy about a sharp dressed man in a light voice as if a lightbulb in his brain had went off. Another lightbulb came on in his head alarm bells in his head were ringing. But wait... his friends were really here goodness gracious. He must have been exhausted with fear and dehydration. He hallucinated the assasains faces saying we know how you feel we can control how you think like a sports game you can never win they laughed menacingly and evilly. Leroy screamed and cried at the top of his lungs YOU CAN"T CONTROL THAT. YOU CAN"T CONTROL HOW I THINK AND HOW I RUN THINGS. Leroy woke up Iam Mr Brightside it was just a dream...just a dream. He grabbed his wife Leslie's picture and kissed it I thank God each and every single day since the day you came into my life my long lost love Leslie.

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Leroy remembered having a thornbush. Lately Leroy had been irritated and thought of anyone who tried to talk to him a thorn in his side. Once he was at a farm with thornbushes and there were some goats he put honey on the thornbush and the goats were so hungry they ate through it. It was totally safe. If Leroy was King for a day his crown he decided would be made of thorns and something that looked like spider webbing.That would definateley be his costume. Webs of lies told by nasty selfish men. The nasty selfish men were like spiders luring the flies through its hypnotic web of lies. And when the spider bit the fly to suck its blood, the bite was worse then bleeding to death. Drowning, suffocating while dreaming of the world going out of control and him falling through the deep depths of the ocean. He was near the bottom now falling through cracks of lodestone. While screaming for abused peoples rights, God and his long lost love Juliet he saw angry faces glare at him from the top of the ocean. He hid his hands in his face God he whimpered praying for everyone let yourself use my love tonight.

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My body aches to breath your breath. And your ghost will be the one to hold me down kissing you so hard. You'll wipe away my tears as my eyes close and you begin to cry too on my wet face. Its night time and its dark you hold my neck up. I feel like a suffocating fish lost out of water and onto land and all out of place. These memories of hurt will stay forever like scars. My voice will yearn for you like so many other long lost loves of other people. The night is a good companion for me for its so dark like death. Oh how do I live without you Leslie he muttered your lost words are the only thing keeping me alive like a slave to you. Your siren song has had me hooked even after death. I feel so betrayed how many times Ive been tried to be assasinated and they tried to make me stumble then crawl. Night is now more comfortable then the mornings I face. All I do now is walk around feeling like my life is a lie. Four honest words remain in my heart to stay I love you Juliet.

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Leroy was on a long black train and said its a long piece of time, a long trip alone. It was fall the leaves were fallen and had changed colour. He asked about the weather to the man sitting beside him. The weather isn't supposed to be windy just fall and a pale bleak sky. Awkward silence. The man said nice grey trenchcoat you got there Leroy. Leroy said thanks Iam going to Boston to return it for another one I got it from Boston because grey is my favourite coulor. Hmm said the man why did you come all the way from ON Canada on a slow train just to go to Boston he asked inquivestiley. My wife Leslie died awhile ago I have been taking walks around to ease my troubled mind so to add on to that I decided to go on a slow train to Boston, here's a picture of me and my wife she's my long lost love and grey out of all the colors is the color I connect to the most out of my heartbreak. A waitress came a offered them some cofee. They both said yes Leroy tried to pour his own cofee but it spilled all over his hands and he didn't even care or notice. The waitress and man looked up at him in shock. They waitress said you okay Leroy. Yes he responded just an accident he said shortly.

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Right...Leroy said angrily punching his boxing opponent at the gym. She cheated with another prince she's not my princess anymore. Now she's his long lost love and its all in my head but he's singing about her everyday since they broke up like a long lost love. Leroy punched angrier whenever she needed help she'd go to the other man not... me he thought with clenched teeth. How many times had he turned to this independent woman for help. This sensitive sweet woman who loved him. Oh how the perfect couple must have completed eachother right under my very nose. But what about how she completed me. Leroy said sorry I must leave the gym early today apparently Iam not the one to sweep her off her feet lead her up the stairwell. Some people in the gym turned to watch him walk out of the gym. He then walked to the park and sat on a bench what's wrong with me why am I crying like this why am I so lonely. Then he stopped crying and ran home excitedly he called for a special delivery on Red rose Island 10,000 fake red roses, 78 pices of lumber and a white horse statue to get back the girl he loved. Little did he know he had halloucinated the part about the cheating.

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Computer antalysts to him seemed to have very hard jobs. The computer data files were written cryptically. If the computers needed fixing hands on the wires would be hard to put in the right place atleast for him with all the wires. Glitches,freezing but how do you get your message across to God that the days were way to long he felt for humans going through tough times and he really was worried sick that it would end up hurting God mentally and bring him down and drive him to a level of mental illness of starving humans for a long time. He knew God would probably only start this in the 2007's for it was a very distinctive date in time. Leroy turned some light soothing music for he felt it soothed his nerves. How would God give this message to his abused victims and how could he become there obedience trainer if something went wrong and it got so bad that perfection was way too close to being false. AHHHH Iam going to call the mental distress line again he said hobbling to the phone when he got there his numb fingers curled around the phone and he talked about men intimidating him and there faces haunting his dreams, his wife Juliet and how his heart ached without his long lost love and about him being worried sick about God whom he loved and cared about with a passion.

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Selfish nasty people can leave shatterable dissapointment on one's life like a person swimming under water in slow slow slow motion with the vision blurred. Spinning around, with heartbeats moving the picture. Why do they do this for greed, revenge and love. Yes, love to the point of desperation of saying I'd do anything, give up all I had. Pitiful human wishes that effect others around them in the coldness of their hearts. They won't remember what you did or what you said but they will remember how you made them feel was a saying Leroy had known. Some people were so nasty they'd make you have strong emotional responses when extemely guilty that you yourself would become masacistic against yourself. You'd have trouble trusting again. All they had to do to make you extremely guilty was go crimanally insane. There's a snake in every neighbourhood. Leroy thought I have so much sweetness and would give it all up to his sing song bird, God and praise him with the song Hallelujah. All of me to you God he felt trusting of God because of God's life long experiences. He wanted to hold him, there went without saying he had a connection with God a chemistry for example they were both pink for communisum. He was warm to his beloved God and humbled himself and tipped his hat as a tribute and respect. As long as Leroy lived he tenderly cared about God and others. As in tender I mean the voice of a bleeding rose. As long as you love me I love you God I want you to thrive in a life full of feelings and love.

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Sing alongs in school he thought I was always the type to sing along and dance. When asked a simple question he would sing along to song lyrics to answer the question. Same with assingments, talks with friends. For dance he wanted to dance expressive dance of a long lost love song like that Mr Brightside remix he liked but he was too lazy. People overate singing and dancing he thought because at anytime or place it was there. Wow cats really do think there God he thought because people who fight hard to get what they want with there claws obviously don't know they can accomplish anything they set there mind too. The details in his own face and body were detailed as though he got his wisdom from war. War is a very tough thing to go though can leave you traumatized he said fingers curling. When Leroy was a puppy Leroy dreamed of establishing safety for everyone women and children first. He wondered what it be like to be a cop he looked up to them as a child for he pretended to be one as a child. If only the authourities would hear his pale soul scream inside for he was physically ill inside and sometimes would scream through the silence of too many people not knowing how people had sneakily done things too him and hurt him in too many ways. Leslie would say Tarzan my Tarzan you are an actual man to Leroy. Leroy's detailed face smile at her Leslie my long lost love where would I be without the voice that spoke up for all abused people which has always been yours and your love.

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Leroy dreamed about Leslie he was kissing her with a kiss that felt as though it was his first again so passionate as soon as they kissed they floated to the clouds the blushing cheeks touched eachother and could feel there warmth. And we'll never come down he stroked the hair on her forehead and kissed her forehead. Then he was dreaming of happier times where they'd play teddybear kills to eat Hurley of lost the muffin man. And do the sailor disco dance in there pajamas. They 'd play halloween food monsters crashing the mall going as Mr hamburger and Mrs pizza. He sometimes suggested to pretend to be Willie Nelson and get a sugar glider and act crazy and scream shotgun willie in his underwear. Or pretend God had seen his face and smited him for fun. Or they'd dance as stupid as possible and bobble there heads to headbang as a joke to laugh at. Or they'd pretend she was the blond who turned back time and started all blond jokes. Or pretend to meet demere lost damsels in distress in bars who turned to eachother for help and kissed passionately and catfighted. They'd pretend monkeys ran the government.

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Leroy talked to God in private and told him he was a paranoid sczaphrenic and was scared and paranoid God had abused women with oppression and abuse. Leroy loved God and sang Hallelujah to him. But whenever he sang Hallelujah his heart sunk it reminded him of his wife Leslie, baffled about what to do with himself without her he didnt want to pick himself out of bed anymore he was so baffled. Tell me your problems God and I'll try to kiss them all away whether it be needing someone to talk to about the 6 billon people on earth which he wanted some to kiss all his problems away. Or if he wanted celebrities to do fundraiser days for abused women. Well all girls are princesses he smiled.

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Leroy ran home in the cold windy night sweaty and cold. He was running after his hallucination of Leslie. I couldnt live with what I had done so I took my own life she said. Days way to long, nights cant sleep at all. No one hears me just like white noise in the backround of a bad radio station. Physically ill cant sleep many nights of guilt poor Leroy how could he say that to her. You have the inner beauty of the ugliest man alive, disgrace she spit. If her picture was the last long lost love link keeping long lost loves toghether. Leroy vomited she continued on suppose nothing was there for a link but there was but no one noticed or cared. Leroy muttered crazy eyed and pale what a terrible thing to say to her HOW COULD I. HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO HER. She continued on act one in the begginng Adam and Eve. And now all that's left of this woman is pain. Hang yourself Leroy. Leroy was in three places at once because he was hallucinating he was sailing on the lake after Leslie tryng to throw her one of his love letters in a bottle. While she rowed away while he lost the love of his life. He was in the abandoned building with termites she was in a hangman's noose with an imaginary lake of fire under it saying kill yourself. He tried but ended up falling through the stairs with termites in them. And he was where he actually was now chasing after his long lost love Leslie.

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Sometimes Leroy and Calissa would have all nighters of passionate talks where they would talk about there feelings of the love they felt for eachother. Talks of what there passion for eachother meant to eachother. They'd hold eachother like if they let go a bolt of elecricity would leave them paralysed unable to feel there warm touch again in fear of this there hands locked. Leroy said a place for everything and everything in its place like our hands with our wedding rings, our hands belong in eachothers hands. A place for the desert, a place for the sea, a place for chairs and forks knives and spoons. Leroy woke up out of his dream and screamed I WANT YOU BACK I...I...I WANT YOU BACK. Your hand belongs in my hand and mine in yours. He reached for his and her picture under his pillow. Oh Calissa you were the best I ever had the said rubbing his tearstrained face hands trembling. He settled down when were reunited in heaven there will be a castle for you my tiny dancer and only you my tiny dancer we'll stand by eachother forever as prince and princess I'll sweep you off your feet lead you up the stairwell on a white horse. I'd wait 60 years just to be the next to be with you another 60 if I had to.

Leroy's Heartbreak 9

Suddenly enemies of Leroy surrounded Leroy's wife. It played slowly in his head over and over. He saw them talk badly of her and him and threaten her. Leroy
screamed NOOO and cut the rope for the chandelier as it crashed and killed his enemies. Except for Juliet she wasnt even hurt. Want to talk about it he said hoarsely. Juliet ran away from him come back he yelled in hurt. What...want to know how I feel, want to know how I feel about you Juliet passionate with a beating heart full of bleeding love. Its my job to protect God Iam a gangster and he needs someone to take care of him. He was crying everyday my heart beats for you, you know I feel like everytime Ive ever kissed you it feels like our first kiss all butterflies and light headed. If you leave me tonight Ill throw pebbles at your window all night of the month with red roses and detailed love letters written so well and professionally you'd swear I went to college for 8 years just to write them for you. Juliet stopped running away from him and walked slowly to him and they kissed passionately. He held his wifes face let go home. Leroy had been abused by these kinds of men often times before like this and mentally badly. He was very scared of men.

Leroy's Heartbreak 8

I kissed a girl and I liked it the taste of her cherry chapstick sang Katy Perry on the Radio. Girls kissing girls gave him scarlett fever it was his guilty pleasure. Just put Eva Longoria and Shakira together wearing scarlett dresses passionately kissing in a bar drunk Shakira saying I broke up with my homely looking husband and winked at Eva. Eva turned Shakira's face gently towards hers and she said darling I tend to get catty and get in a cat fight for all the girls. Then they both stood up and paused jumped in the air and started cat fighting. After it was over. They said sorry and kissed. Eva said my husband spends to much time at work cried and ran out of the bar and into the rain. Shakira ran after her into the rain caught her and kissed her. He stopped daydreaming my... my wife Iam a pathetic old man tears ran down his face. I think I'll go to the beach and make footprints in the sand wherever you will go my sweet wife. A bleak sunset perfect for long lost loves.

Leroy's Heartbreak 7

Leroy was talking to his lawyer they'd write innapropriate comments on his interent pages that had been hacked into his computer by the assasains he said shrilly they'd sexually harass him as a child and mentally bring him down. My enemies protect me from them God there here for me and you. They keep trying to trip me for your power your majesty. The power of being dead while you are alive and walking. We'd better move fast General John Mackenzie our wives are waiting at home to leap into our arms. The General responded gruffly family to attend to eh my wife is tender eyed and loving very pleasant woman to be around very sweet voice how about yours. Leroy responded I only have a wife Iam amazed by her she turns my face red everytime I see her, you want to know a secret Iam planning a surprise for her a candlelight diner by the lake red roses scattered all around our picnic table. I actually met her on a place called Red rose Island. At night I gaze at my pillow and picture her there makes me homesick just the thought of being without her for a day till the day I die I cant take my eyes off of her. Leslie...Leslie you must have been the blond who started all blond jokes you silly thing. Well Leroy you moonwalk your way out of the room to get out of this one. Suppose I should I got the dartboard downstairs want to play cupid on Leroy's heart. They kissed romantically mmm.... yes said his wife. Leroy muttered under his breath Leslie... Leslie he opened his eyes and snapped out of the daydream. Dr Jones he thought we have a problem with heartbreak of a major long lost love Leslie...Leslie.

Leroy's Heartbreak 6

Mountains can't have enough of them really oh where would we be without cheating the test of long lost love in life still climbing nope because we'd all just die of heartbreak. Ha the nose knows Bartholemuel or Pharoh whoever you are right under your very very big nose will smell a hospital near by with me in it just smelling sick people. What else does the nose know to smell cool scents AHHH he laughed evilly and viciously were doomed. Mouth moving numbly he curled into a ball and whispered to himself I know all the answers but I need the puppets with the strings up. Huh wh...what that voice my conscience angels no just can't be. There were 5 angels in his room. Come back for your own grieving soul come for the oppressed women come for all who have long lost loves your wife and God. Now here me now here's what you are to do go to college for journalism write a really moving good book I'll help you with that one of the angels said in a shaken voice. The other angel continued on then make your very own charity for oppressed women and drive across Canada and the United States advertizing for this. God is very shaken and needs you. Goodbye for now.

Leroy's Heartbreak 5

When Leroy felt physically ill and mentally ill his sczaphrenia kicked in. As though his paws would moves numbly with a sence of obsessevness and he'd talk like really slowly and obsessively with his mouth moveing numbly. He felt like he had to feel so physically ill he should go to bed every night waking up all sweaty and cold walking around or should i say hobbling tensely. Leroy cried alot, hands rubbing his wet face. His voice was hoarse like he was on life support and in bad shape. Will I ever learn what I have lost in life my my...WIFE GIRLFRIEND oh how I miss her as he layed in the fetal position on the floor everyday I loved you since I first laid eyes on you even though your gone my mind is captivated each and everyday we'll be in eachothers hearts and her eyes I could get lost in that intense loving warm eyes I drift into happy daydreams when I gaze into her eyes. He gave her pet names like Leslie, Juliet, Calissa because they all reminded him of long lost love names. He stroked his hair and muttered I'd fall down on my knees kiss the ground you walk on baby if I could just hold you again. I'll never let you down, never make you cry, never break your heart. He woke up and screamed at the top of his lungs and called the Crisis line for mental illness and sobbed I had a very weird dream my very long days seem to have gotten longer my mental illness is getting worse and at anytime in the day I tend to scream at the top of my lungs and sob.

Leroy's Heartbreak 4

When they had put a robotic brain glands in his head at the age of 10 he knew something wasn't right he could just smell the rat. Something just wasn't right with the world as he knew it or him.
His thoughts were as though a playwright for actors had made them exist. There was too little happening in the world to help people out especially oppressed women. It was like some crazy voodoo game had been created. And he was one of the dolls and he just felt angry... so so so angry he was a underdog and then he became angier and more criminally insane. His father had talked down to him as a child telling him to smile perfectly. No independent women is going to catch me hahaha he laughed freakishly to himself... all alone yes... yes I am better off on my own.
He spit his gum into the garbage barbie girls can't get enough of them really must we all hold on to treasured memories of our long lost loves... why isn't my love life like the gum in the garbage and for everyone. Daddy's little girl eh huh funny what would she think of me nothing she'd just walk out of my life and become a punk living on the streets. She'd take lots of drugs and become the new image britney spears is trying to display. And she'd be a gangster drinking beer every second of the day hands shaking kind of my want for the rest of my life too. I don't actually have a daughter never had never will. Somehow now I am this fragile small egg on the great wall of China just like Humpty Dumpty everybody's fool, the pieces of my life left after my fall will never be put back together again. A compulsive liar even though not I belong in the mouth of a chewing pig.

Leroy's Heartbreak Three

Leroy always pretended to be a gangster like Natalie Portman or the guys on grand theft auto he'd keep notes around saying Bark with me if your my dog, Dogs have masters cats think there God and have staff, Give a dog a bone, Puppy dog eyes.,Underdog, Every dog has its day, Top Dog, Wagging tail. Leroy wanted to study aggresiveness in males against males they seemed like the type to trip eachother for girls but never the type to woo girls romantically that much just not into the romantic thing if it wasn't them being wooed like a princess. I... hate them so much they know all my passwords Iam crimanally insane and a professional. I could hide behind they happiest mask but be contentious and physically ill lonely to hold a girl and mentally unhappy and strained. These men are so big muscularly and think they can get away with anything. Words cant describe how much I hate them if I was a girl my eyes would be screaming for girls till the day that I die I cant take my eyes off of any one he would be attracted to. Cross my heart and hope to die I just gotta be with a girl even if its means hell on earth 100 years would only seem like 3 days for the love he felt for the girl he wanted. Though Leroy wasn't a human woman he could just sense the heartbreak he could flatout see because women were so beautiful and funloving. Leroy was so sensitive and emotional he didnt have to be one to know one he could feel emotion well. What would the loss of their long lost loves do to them yes... what would it do that's where Leroy should have been scared... They could have been on the verge of crimanl insanity. Including God.

Leory's Heartbreak Two

Cars driving through the black night. Cinammon perfume is the only thing left of his
memory of the girl he fell in love with long ago. Seeing people's faces is as though there
are multiple people of them, like assassins grouped in four trying to kill him.
You will always be my tiny dance dancing in my hand, my princess whom I love like the
multiple of stars.
Remembering the men who destroyed our family we should have had and the day I layed
you in the ground was the day I lost my mind.
I sometimes feel your warm prescence in my lifeless sleep.
I imagined myself as the peoples lives flashing right before their very eyes starring
of beer and hearbreak.
Slow lives passing by for trillion of years since Adam and Eve like a pendalum
swinging hypnoticaly telling me to bleed mentally, wasting a way thinking of you.
White, the color white yes, yes your wedding dress to me your wre perfect like Juliet
in Romeo and Juliet. I promised to try to be perfect for you my Kryponite.
Wait where am I now, where we first met; Red Rose Island your favorite kind of
flowers. I'd buy them so much for you because I treasured having the chance of being lucky
enough to meet you.
When I am in the dark gulp like a pathetic old man, what's left of me I say and answer
a pathetic old man. I am so...lost without you and begin to cry.
My physiatrist teslls me to smarten up so I fake my wellness but when no ones looking
I turn through sick lullabies and walk to an abandoned building with termites.
I keep five cats with me in my house for company. I think I tend to get crazy without
them. I am so crazy, I begin to think about them talking to me as ghosts and all are named
Juliet...(cries) my princess.